Never Be Afraid of the Road

        Some years back, I attended Marylhurst University and received my degree in Human Studies.  Many of the classes I had the honor of taking, awoke an inner dialog that was rich and full.  As the years past, even though the voices were never quiet they began to fade into more whispers.  Over this past year, as I have concentrated on building Mama Jean’s into a viable working model, one that can support me full time, I have also been longing to reawaken the voices and continue the work I feel calling me.  Recently I’ve had the opportunity to attend a Shamanic Journeying Class focusing on Writing our own creation myth.  My mind and heart feel as if they have exploded into an awakening.  But as with any awakening, comes the awareness of dawning of all the shadows we have.  The lingering work we still need to touch and work through. 

Sewing endless hours in a day allows for the mind to wonder to and fro or linger in places that allow for creating a new way of honoring the voices that call out to be heard.  I find the act of sewing and especially the act of quilting the quilt becomes a very Zen time.  A time to release, breathe and contemplate life in all its wonder. 

Yesterday I saw a car hit a small squirrel and as I started to drive by realized it was still alive.  So I stopped to remove it from the road. Earlier in the month I had the exact same situation happen.  I also stopped and placed the dying squirrel back into the park he was from under a lovely tree.  I lifted up his wee spirit and said a prayer over him as gentle tears streamed down my face.  This time, the level of emotional outpouring was almost overwhelming.  I was at first confused and distressed.  Why was this coming into my life, not once but twice? Why was I here a second time? What message was I not hearing or giving enough attention to? What have I done wrong? In reality I hadn’t done anything wrong.  Things happen in and around us everyday that we may or may not be aware of but when or attention is caught I believe it’s important to try and understand.  I contacted a friend who helped me just allow the feelings to flow and to help me process it in the moment but later I spent some time meditating on the whole experience and all the experiences that had been bubbling all month.  In refection, these are the words I shared with the friend who had helped me in the moment.

I lit a small candle for the wee one and made a cup of tea and sat in the sun for a time allowing the emotions to wash over me and through me.  I forgot the intensity of spirit. As I feel the need to once again walk in the ways of the intuitive seer and I feel her presence more and more each day I am reminded that big work requires heart.  My heart is pouring out opening up and allowing for new to grow in a way that I would have never foreseen.  I am not asking for this cup to pass from me.  This wee little spirit with a heart of gold allowed me the opportunity to reflect on it's beauty and wonder and joy it experienced each day of it's little life.  How it lived fully each day, not hiding from the road or the dangers but boldly living and in living with pure intent no hidden agendas, no shadows of things long past, no worries of what may come.  I too want to live freely experience all that life has for me.  Does it mean my heart will feel deeply, I pray so, does it mean that I will love deeper than I've ever love, may this too be so, will I know pain, only in knowing can I appreciate the life that I have to experience it in the first place, May spirit always be near to remind me of the worlds that are all connected and traveling here and there is just a part of life that will forever be richer for the knowing. May I be open to seeing all those in my life and how I can honor them each day in thought and deed.  Tender is my world and I always want it to be so.

As I reflect upon these words again I am reminded that I not only want this in my personal life, I want to reflect this in Mama Jean’s.  I want to live with open heart and mind, and embrace the every day moments that occur and how privileged I am to be experiencing them each day.  The days when I feel like for every seam I put in I tear out two, the days when it hums like a fine tuned car, or the times when the sound of my sewing machine reminds me of a song and I find myself singing and laughing as I sew.  Or, how amazing and incredible it still is that each day I wake, I get to choose to do something I love and hopefully in the doing, share the magic I feel when creating a quilt for someone.  So like my sweet little squirrel friends, I want to never be afraid of the road or the dangers but boldly living and in living with pure intent no hidden agendas, no shadows of things long past, no worries of what may come.  I too want to live freely experience all that life has for me.

Dreaming Once Again

It seems a lifetime since last I wrote.   In a way, it has been one.  It's been over a year of working and changing and growing.  Not only in Mama Jean's but also in life.  My business is still growing and believe it or not, I still love what I do.  How amazing is that?  To have built a life that allows me freedom to create all day long, anything I can dream.

             Dreaming has changed my world.  I have dreams of how I want to grow my business and what projects I want to try and create.  I set goals for the year based upon my dreams and then, when the dream comes true I question is this real or am I still dreaming until I accidentally stitch my finger while working on a new project and I smile, for the dream has become my reality. 

I dreamed one day of my work being in a gallery, and in just a few days, that dream will come true as well.  So many people over the years have called my art “crafty” not true art. Alas, I know this to be untrue but still the lingering desire to be validated in the realm that others deem reality has lingered.  As part of a collective show, with other artist, who also long to be validated and who create from their heart feels amazing. 

I had dreams of my work being filled with magic and wonder for each person who ordered one. Either for self or as a gift for others and within each quilt I strive to weave love and wishes for a life full of blessings and memories that will be carried on through the quilt as it is passed from one family member to the next. Each wear and tear will only elevate the value of the tattered quilt in the eyes of the family thus creating the true magic.  

The amazing messages from those who have purchased a quilt have touched my heart and guide me to remain true to my mission.  To create, unique quilts, with no two ever being the same honoring the individual who has ordered it. To help build a world full of magic and joy. Where laughter is tickling at every corner as sweet dreams drift gently upon them as the slumber through the night. 

I have also found my daily life to be filled with dreams again.  Dreams of spirit and worlds unknown; yet familiar in every way. Bringing me back to a place I had almost forgotten.  One of magic and mystery.    Seeking truth through spiritual growth has touched me deeply and re-awakened the longing of seeking truth and understanding of the worlds we live within.  Of living from the heart in all we do. Of walking gently upon the earth and being touched deeply by the sweetness of life allowing an innocence of life to fill me again. To once again walk in the wonder of spirit and to see through eyes that have for to long been dim.  I am listening, I am breathing and I am hearing and the songs and stories that are coming forth rock my world at a core level.  Embracing spirit again has brought utter joy into my heart and tears of gratitude flow freely.  The work is worthy of the time and though the journey isn’t always clear the view along the way is breathtaking. 

I feel as if I am creating a quilt of life full of magic and wonder for myself again.  Stitched in love and full of secret messages and blessings in each piece I choose to add.  Spirit swirls in the patterns of the quilting and the lining is dipped in stardust and dream magic.  If I be dreaming now, may I never wake for this is the world I long to live in.  

photo by Jhada Addams

Quiliting Lessons I've Learned Along the Way

Two years ago, I got a quilting frame for my machine to work on large quilts.  It was scary at first, trying to figure out all the ins and outs and loading a quilt took me hours to try and figure out.  Kind of makes me smile today when I think back on those days.  Now, I can load a quilt in about half an hour and start quilting right away.  I will admit I have learned a few tricks along the way that help and so I thought for anyone else who might be starting quilting on a frame I'd share a few of my thoughts. 

Remember, you like to sew and quilting makes you happy.  This is important to remember because as little things come up it's easy to lose site of the good stuff.

Don't start with a king size.... be real that's a lot of quilt for anyone even the best so find something smaller that you can handle. 

Always buy extra thread no matter what.  You'd be surprised how many mistakes you will make getting tension right and have to start over and that thread that you knew would be enough will be gone and it will be 10pm and you know you can't get to the store until morning. 

Wind two extra bobbins from what you think you will need.  Never fails. I've gotten down to the last two passes and I have to stop and wind a bobbin maybe even two and it drives me crazy.  I would rather have a bit extra on a bobbin that I can use up in the future then have to stop one more time. 

Take the time to bring up the bottom thread when you have to load a new bobbin or the thread breaks.  It makes it so much nicer looking in the end.  Keep at least two pair of sharp trimming scissors near by. You will be surprised how often you will have to look for them.  Locking tweezers for helping to pull up the bobbin thread when you are start can't be beat. 

Floating your quilt top is by far the easiest way to quilt hands down in my opinion.  You can find loads of tutorials all over the internet to show you how. 

Invest in the large zippers that help you put load a quilt on your frame.  Again, tons of tutorials to help you work it out, in the end you will be so glad you invested the time to set up your frame with the zippers. 

Don't forget to keep oil around for your machine.  Quilting takes a lot out of your machine and you need to keep her happy

When the string breaks a hundred and one times, walk away.  Take a break, go walk around your garden for a bit and breath the fresh air.   It will clear your head of the cob webs that are starting to take hold in your brain and when you go back to the machine, rethread from top to bottom... almost always works. 

Don't be afraid to play with the tension it's the only way to really understand it and you will have to adjust according to the type of thread you will be using  Even the bobbin tension and yes, I know, Mom told us never to touch.  Touch it you might need to to get everything just right.

Invest in good coffee it really does make a difference as you take a moment to look over your work and enjoy a break. 

So when all is said and done the most important thing in the world to me is to stay positive and send all the love and good wishes you can into your quilt. Your quilt will be a gift for someone you love or will be on your own personal bed and you don't want to look at it and remember all the broken threads.  But remember, you just made a quilt.  All those ripped out seams or broken threads were worth it and pat yourself on the back and get back out there.  So much fabric, so little time.

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Custom Designed Men's Shirts

A customer needed shirts, custom designed, for her 6'4'' husband and all in all think they turned out nice. 

Who Inspires You?

Every person has that one person in their life that inspired them to try something new. After sewing for 40 years my dear friend convinced me to try quilting.  A few fumbles and sketchy efforts later,  I fell in love with it and haven't looked back.   Just look at me now, maker of things that go bump in the night. Day of the Dead, skeletons an skulls, wicked dead things and pagan beauty, All in all, not a bad life.
Thanks dear friend for all your love and support. For always being there to encourage me through all, not only quilting, but life.  It's a journey I would never have imagined and yet one that brings me endless joy and a world of possibilities. 

New Ideas

  It's a great one in Vancouver Wa the Recycled Fair and your products have to be made using upcycled items.  For me, this means: Day of the Dead Potholders, Scrappy Quilts with lots of the leftovers from other quilts and bits and pieces of batting tucked together to make a small quilt.  I also take my little Sewphies, all scraps and the cute little booties from woolen end bits and pieces.  This year I will be adding a new item, Men's dress shirts with appliquéd skulls and Day of the Dead images on the back or sides.  It should be great fun to see all the different options and I will be using dress shirts I picked up at Goodwill as the base.  All of this, because a customer asked me to doll up a coat for her.   I found it refreshing and fun to work on and inspiring. 

Another customer asked me to help him create a wall hanging for his office.  He is a Dr. of nutrition for kids and it's a veggie face and it's been such a joy working on this silly face.  My spirits can't help but be lifted up.  It got me to thinking that I want to try and have more wall hangings for fair.  I love the detailed quilting and using all the amazing threads out there.  I also appreciate that they are smaller and easier to complete.

So, this year for fair I am trying to work smarter not harder and have fun new items for my customers.  Seems like a win win to me.

March Madness

So, lets say your friends tell you that in a year or so you will be sewing for a living and making quilts featuring Day of the Dead, skeletons, spiders, custom art and pagan stars you might have said "are you nuts?"  But as I reflect back over the past two years and the journey I've been on to get to this point right now today, I realize that that is exactly how I am making a living.  Am I surprise, yea a bit. I always thought when I started out on this journey I would be sewing dresses for women of real sizes and shirts for men of real sizes this was quickly converted to really, a Day of the Dead quilt, brilliant can I have one too.  So the dresses and shirts sort of took a back seat and the quilts took over my life.  I am covered, literally in fabrics with smiling, laughing, dancing skeletons all about and let's face it.. they make me happy.  I can't help but smile when I see them, I love let me rephrase I LOVE working in bright happy colors and the feeling of taking another quilt off my quilt frame well I'm not going to say it beats a good cup of coffee and a piece of great chocolate but hey, there needs to be a few sacred things left in the world, but truly it's incredible.  I adore seeing them come out of the dryer covered in the magic of quilting I just can't help but give each and everyone a big hug. The warmth of the dryer lingers in the quilt and I give a little thanks to the person who order it for making my dreams come true.  So, for all those who say dreams don't really come true, maybe just maybe it's right there a bit different then you thought you saw but there still the same just waiting for you to embrace it and dance away into the sunset.